Chapter 44

chapter Forty Four

*Ariya*

I hated this plan. Almost as much as I hated plan B. If they were wrong this could go very bad. I didn't have much time to dwell on it. Justin was going to be back soon. I told them to reach out to me before and after so I knew. They told me they wouldn't be able to tell me who they were guessing Ivan was but they said they would let me know the outcome. Keo said I had to put it together myself from my memories. I hated it. I had an idea but they wouldn't confirm or deny it. I tried to play a mind game and tell them that they confirmed it by refusing to deny it but that got twisted around on me.

I had them lock the conversation after the connection was severed and remembered to have them lock the fact that I knew that Keo had turned already. When they asked why I told them because I was testing Justin and his loyalty. Keo growled at me about how I felt about Justin but I dismissed his growls as usual. He was being the overprotective brother and I appreciated him for it. I knew it was because he cared. But I think he was rooting for Ivan more than anything.

I asked Drake to alter his locks that he placed because I was trying to get my memories back and to keep feeling like I was missing something, was bugging me. Drake altered the lock so that when I was alone I would remember everything as well. He said once Ivan knew who he was and I knew who he was, I would be able to retain my memories if it was just Ivan and I. But until then, the conversations between Drake, Keo, Caleb and I were only accessible if I was alone.

I felt the memories start to disappear and I knew that someone was coming. Justin walked in with piping hot food. The smell hit my nose and my mouth started watering.

"Oooooo that smells so good!" I exclaimed.

Justin laughed, "I take it you're hungry?"

Justin brought the food over and sat down on the floor with me.

"Aren't you going to get into trouble?"

"No one is going to be coming over here. Besides, Boss said to stay here and watch you. Per his words, I'm only allowed to leave to get food, to sleep, and to update him when you have another memory. Otherwise I'm supposed to be here, watching you." Justin winked at me.

I laughed, "Don't get into trouble. That's not going to make matters better."

"Well then let me know when you get a memory. I'm not thinking you'll get another right now or for the rest of today at least."

"Do you know how the memories come back or something?"

Justin laughed, "No, just a guess. This was your first memory right?"

"Yes."

"Well, it happened when you were asleep. I'm guessing that you might have to be asleep for your memories to come back. But I'm also guessing it is only going to come back a little at a time."

"So what, during the day, I don't have to stress about getting tortured? But during the night I have to hope that I get more memories back so that I can keep myself from being tortured during the day?"

"Something like that. Don't stress about it. I'm sure it will come back to you naturally."

"Can't help but stress about it."

"Why's that?" Justin asked.

"My first memory was me watching my Mom fight to try to protect me and some Shadow had some explosive device that was able to light the ground around my Mom on fire. WHICH, if you can't put two and two together, lit her on fire."

Justin flinched, "I'm sorry that was your first memory but I'm sure the most traumatic ones are going to come back first."

"Exactly why I can't help but stress about it. What's next?"

"I'm not sure, but I'll be here, Ariya."

"You can't sleep here. You'll get into trouble."

"I know but I'll still be here. I'll be here when you wake up."

"What if you get here after I've already woken up? I would have already suffered through whatever it was for a while."

Justin's expression softened. He put his hand on my cheek, pulling me softly to him, "I'll be here. To help you through it. I'll be here, Ariya."

"Promise?"

"I mean I can't promise to be here before you wake up, but I promise I will be here."

"Then promise me you won't leave me. Promise me you won't abandon me."

"AriyaI promise I won't leave you or abandon you of my own free will."

The tears burned my eyes. Justin wiped the stray tears away, a worried look on his face. He pulled me to his chest and hugged me tightly.

"Ariya, I don't think your family abandoned you. From what it sounds like, your family was trying to protect you."

I sniffed, "I know. But that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt."

"Want me to punch them in the face when I meet them? I can do it, you know. I might piss my pants when I do, but I can do it. "

I laughed, "They might fight you. You realize that some of them bite, right?"

Justin went a little pale, "Right. Forgot about that part."

"Are you going to be ok being around them? That is if I ever get out of here?"

"Probably not at first. It will take some time. But if they're like you, I'm sure I'll be ok."

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For being honest. For not trying to sugar coat things. For being you but being willing to try to understand."

"Ariya, for some reason, I feel like I need to. Especially with you."

"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked, confused.

"I don't know. I just feel like I need to protect you. You matter to me, you always have. But I feel like sometimes I need to protect you. Like you're this innocent person in this giant mess and I just want to shield you from it all. Even if it means protecting you from your family."

"You don't need to protect me from them. Drake, Keo, Caleb, Ivan. They'd never hurt me."

"You say that now, but Ariya, the only one you know is Caleb at this point. You haven't been around Drake or Keo for what, 14 years? And you don't even know who Ivan is. How do you know you can trust them?"

*What if he is right?* I thought.