Chapter 72

chapter Seventy Two

*Ariya*

Ivan responded quickly and grabbed hold of Keo's hands, holding him in place.

"Give her back control. NOW!" Ivan growled, his wolf eyes glowing.

"Keo! Stop! Come back here! Please!" I begged.

We watched everything that unfolded on screen. But what was worse is that everyone felt the hunger my body felt. The hunger I felt. It had affected Drake so much that he had dropped to his knees. He had one hand in a fist on the ground and the other was clutching his head. Keo materialized in front of us and my body in the physical world seemed to go limp.

"I'm sorry!" I shouted running to Keo, helping him up.

"Ari, you need to" Keo started.

"I know! I just. I can't! Boss is regulating it. But I also don't know how to heal someone yet. I just. I don't want to hurt him." I interrupted Keo.

"I don't know how you manage to stay in control." Keo said softly.

"You should get out of here, Keo." Drake said, regaining his control.

"I should go with him, that way he can feed." Caleb said.

"I'm sorry." I said looking at the ground.

I could feel them all looking at me and knew they all wanted to say something but I saw Drake shake his head and held his hand up stopping them.

"Not now. After. When we're all under complete control again. Go. I'll meet you guys back there soon." Drake said.

"Ari, it's ok." Keo said.

"Don't stress about it. We'll talk to you soon." Caleb reassured me.

I looked up in time to see them both disintegrate out of my mind. I looked over to Drake.

"Don't. This is natural. Stop feeling bad. I want to know why you've waited so long though." Drake chided me.

"Boss is regulating how much I get." I told him.

"That's no excuse. Ivan is there and I know he would give you blood especially if he knew you needed it." Drake argued.

"He had to shift first." I said, looking at the ground again.

"True but he did that already. You're still making excuses. What's the real issue, Ariya?" Drake growled.

I took a deep breath, "The first time I fed from him I almost killed him. He was Justin then. But still. Then when I lost control with him there, again it was Justin, he was disgusted with me. But since it's been Ivan, I can't bear the thought of him being disgusted with me. I fed from him once already. But it wasn't much. It was only a bit and it was on his finger and I'm afraid if I take too much I'll kill him. But I'm also scared because I don't know how to heal him and I just don't want to hurt him."

The tears started to form in my eyes. I didn't want Drake to think I was ashamed of who I was. I was proud. But I was so confused. I'd been in the same situation that Ivan had been for a while now. The only difference was that I didn't remember the whole story. Sure Ivan had shifted and he was more himself now. But part of me was still terrified. I was scared of losing him. I loved Ivan. Since we were kids I've loved him. I didn't want to hurt him.

Drake came over to me and wrapped his arms around me, "It's ok, Ariya. I know you're confused too. I never really got time to teach you. All of this is happening rather quickly and you are handling it in the only way you know how. I'm amazed by you. Most vampires couldn't handle controlling themselves with the level of hunger you feel. I'm proud of you, Ariya. But you need to go back. You need to feed. I know Ivan is going to be upset that you didn't tell him."

"But I can't heal him. What if I hurt him? What if I kill him?" I started to panic.

"You won't, because I'll still be here. You can always reach out to me at any point. You can even pull me into your mind to start teaching you and I will. Your level of control is astounding, Ariya. So I think by just explaining to you what you need to do, you'll be able to do it."

"Ok." I said, still a bit unsure.

"When it comes to healing, you need to think of putting things back together. You know how you thought of how the room felt and how big it was and all the details? That's pretty much how healing works. You need to visualize what you want to happen. Use a point of contact as the focus and then imagine how the wound is open. From there imagine it closing, imagine it going back together like nothing ever happened. I'm sure you'll be able to do it." Drake told me.

"What if I hurt him or kill him? I don't want to take too much. We aren't bonded yet."

"Think about how much blood he might have then and then only take a quarter of it. That should satisfy the craving enough for now. Tomorrow, do the same thing. Continue doing the same thing every day until the hunger is faint. Ivan is an Original Navi Wolf. He'll be able to handle that amount of loss daily pretty easily." Drake said.

"But won't we get caught with Boss? He's regulating how much I get. Won't he figure out that Ivan's been feeding me if I suddenly can heal no problem?" I asked.

"Possibly. But I might have a solution for that." Drake winked, "It will take some training but I think we can manage it. He's not torturing you yet, so as long as he doesn't go to it we have a bit of time. In the meantime, you can have Ivan tell Boss you're losing control so Boss can give you more. But it's probably better if you don't take what Boss is giving you. Just in case. It will be better if you take it from Ivan. You need to get back. He's going to start to worry."

"Ok. You'll be available in case I need you?"

"I won't feed on my side until I get the all clear from you. Ok? I need to lock your memories real quick before I go anyway. Oh and Ariya, Ivan's loved you since the day he saw you. You're never going to freak him out or disgust him. As long as it is him, you'll never have to worry about that." Drake said.

I nodded and then focused on going back into the room. I held my arms out like I did before and focused on the room where I was being held by Boss. I opened my eyes and looked at Ivan. Drake had finished locking my memories while I was trying to get back. He severed the connection, leaving Ivan and I alone.

"Ari, are you ok? What happened?" Ivan asked, flashing his wolf eyes at me.

"I'm sorry. I just. I've been hungry and when Keo figured out how to get feeling back when he was here it hit him. I didn't realize how bad it was until Keo lost control and we all felt it in my mind." I said, looking down.

"Ari, you need to tell me. I can't feel how you feel. So please. Don't hide it from me. Not now. Not ever." Ivan said softly, lifting my chin to look at me.

"I just didn't want to hurt you" I trailed off.

"Or see a face of disgust that I gave you when I was Justin?" Ivan looked sad.

I nodded.

"I am never going to look at you like that, Ari. I know I did when I was Justin but that isn't going to happen again. I'll give away that I'm a Navi wolf before I do that to you again." Ivan told me.

"No. I don't want you getting hurt. I couldn't bear it." I pleaded with him.

"I'm not going to continue hurting you. Maybe Drake can adjust the lock somehow. We'll talk to him about it later. But for now, you need to feed." Ivan told me.

"But"

"No buts, Ari. You can't hurt me. I'm an Original Navi Wolf. I know we haven't bonded yet, but you're not going to hurt me by feeding from me." Ivan said.

Ivan leaned down and kissed me passionately. He knew it would take my mind away from my thoughts. As he parted my lips and explored my mouth with his tongue my fangs pushed their way out. I let myself feel my hunger as it built up in my throat. I growled in response. Ivan broke the kiss and grinned at me. He flashed his wolf eyes at me and cocked his head to the side giving me access. My eyes shot straight to his neck and I growled. I moved closer to him and scraped my teeth against his neck. He groaned in response as I whined just wanting to sink my teeth into his neck.

"Please, Ari. Feed from me." Ivan begged, whispering in my ear.